The Authentic Me

The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when 

we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only 

in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to 

step out of our ruts and start searching for different 

ways or truer answers ~ M. Scott Peck

Yesterday, I was on my way to the hairdresser for my touch up relaxer.  I had to stop in the drugstore to get a few extra bucks for my hairdresser.  All of a sudden, standing in the line to pay for a magazine, I was hit over the head with a voice saying, “Don’t relax your hair”!!   I didn’t know what to make of that, I am a trust my gut kind of person so I walked out of the store, kinda numb and sat in my car uncertain what to do.  I called a friend: not available. I called my son: he said go for it.  I called my other son, he to said go for it.  I can always reschedule I think to myself.

So I called the salon, cancelled and went home.

I felt like my authentic self was screaming at me to let it come out.

I also don’t want to be a bald 70-year-old woman because I put too many relaxers on my scalp.

Back to my authentic self… I want to connect with this person.  I received a health scare three weeks ago and find myself reeling with numbness and the big question of who am I.  I must now be conscious of everything I put in my mouth.  I am now held accountable for that.

Who am I, on the inside? What do I care about? What are my dreams? What are my goals? How am I trying to reach them? Do I have the discipline?

I think between having to be conscious about what I put in my mouth and taking care of my hair, I will have to do some deep thinking about how I see myself. 

It’s amazing what happens when one is put to the test, stands one’s ground and lets it fly.  I am.

I am taking a big risk.  I am so used to hiding myself in the world behind my chemical hair.  Now I have to not only let myself see the real me, I also have to look at the real me as well.

The good news is I love, love, love hair products.  So getting to go online and look for products I will like and researching the topic

“Transitioning” has been fun, inspiring and enlightening.  There are other women out there just like me, doing the same thing, making the same choice to be without the chemicals on our heads.  Our sacred heads that do so much thinking and feeling and caring. 

The journey continues…