Let the beauty we love be what we do. There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground. - Rumi

Monday, September 19, 2016

Surrender



Surrender

what does this word even mean?

I think it became a word for me when I realized I had to let go of all control I had....about many things in my life...that I could no more control the Sun that shines or the wind that blows...that in the time space continuum where I reside in order to grow
I had to surrender,
it's powerful to let go
it's powerful to release those things that no longer serve
and be open to what will be created 
I had to surrender what was no longer serving me
I think surrender means letting go of the power 
I was using to hold on to something that no longer served me...
and this is the story...

A year ago, this time I had to let go of the way I styled my hair. Not a biggie to some, but for me an mixed race woman with kinky curly hair huge.  Through Instagram I had learned about an internet based business called the giving keys.  You could get a key with a word on it.
I chose surrender- because if something is not working in ones life, one must have the strength to SURRENDER to the change.  Difficult- I was upset, angry, damaged.
But I FOUND my way out.  I let go and slowly but surely embraced the change 'cause more were coming.  I tried all kinds of hair stuff, found someone who liked working with natural hair and MADE PEACE with what was.
As I went through the process of SURRENDERING and making peace I FORGAVE her and realized the relationship was like one of siblings and as I forgave her, I forgave my sister because that was who she r minded me of......odd but true.
She had damaged my scalp quite badly.  She damaged me personally because of the trust I had in her as a friend, but I walked away.

I healed myself...I walked toward my authentic self and becoming who I am meant to be...SURRENDER TO THE TRUTH OF WHO I AM a mixed race woman with kinky hair, kinda wild, wild like the essence of me.

A journey always begins someplace.

And now A YEAR LATER.....I understand what surrender means and see other areas of my life where I continue to be working on SURRENDERING.


Surrender

what does this word even mean?

I think it became a word for me when I realized I had to let go of all control I had....about many things in my life...that I could no more control the Sun that shines or the wind that blows...that in the time space continuum where I reside in order to grow
I had to surrender,
it's powerful to let go
it's powerful to release those things that no longer serve
and be open to what will be created 
I had to surrender what was no longer serving me
I think surrender means letting go of the power 
I was using to hold on to something that no longer served me...
and this is the story...

A year ago, this time I had to let go of the way I styled my hair. Not a biggie to some, but for me an mixed race woman with kinky curly hair huge.  Through Instagram I had learned about an internet based business called the giving keys.  You could get a key with a word on it.
I chose surrender- because if something is not working in ones life, one must have the strength to SURRENDER to the change.  Difficult- I was upset, angry, damaged.
But I FOUND my way out.  I let go and slowly but surely embraced the change 'cause more were coming.  I tried all kinds of hair stuff, found someone who liked working with natural hair and MADE PEACE with what was.
As I went through the process of SURRENDERING and making peace I FORGAVE her and realized the relationship was like one of siblings and as I forgave her, I forgave my sister because that was who she r minded me of......odd but true.
She had damaged my scalp quite badly.  She damaged me personally because of the trust I had in her as a friend, but I walked away.

I healed myself...I walked toward my authentic self and becoming who I am meant to be...SURRENDER TO THE TRUTH OF WHO I AM a mixed race woman with kinky hair, kinda wild, wild like the essence of me.

A journey always begins someplace.

And now A YEAR LATER.....I understand what surrender means and see other areas of my life where I continue to be working on SURRENDERING.

Sunday, September 18, 2016

Goddess woman




Photos taken at the Huntington Library


Goddess woman


Wild, feral, untamed
I am connected to both the Earth and the Divine Consciousness of the Universe....
The light in my soul is spilling out...
I cannot contain my joy, my love, my essence of pure ecstatic happiness to be here- now.

I am as old as dirt
I am as new as the sun that rises everyday
I access the wisdom of my soul
I am she who sees by feeling
I am Goddess
Sacred yoni
I have been broken
I have been in the darkness and emerged into the light
I understand the balance – to be light one must go into darkness..
To be in darkness one must have light to see...
I am the mother of mothers –
My ability to nurture has no boundaries

There are these passages of time where once the motion/action of life begins it cannot be stopped. It was written in time before it began that this is where I will meet and remember who I am.
This is were I will remember who I am:

I am goddess
I am light
I am love
I bless my body
I bless everyone who who crosses my path
I bless the beauty of life
I bless the beauty of the little souls that I am here to guide
I bless the soul of the man who makes me feel good
I bless sacred space
I know that where I am God and goddess are-
I know that the healing abilities I have are activated
And I surrender
I surrender to the beauty and joy and love that are who I am…..
Divine feminine consciousness
Walking my path on this planet





Saturday, July 9, 2016

Where is the Love and Beauty?


LOVE
papers, acrylic on canvas
2016




In this process of reconnecting with my blog and with myself and with the power of words...
I wonder what am I interested in right now?
In what do I see love and beauty?
I think without trying to sound or be egotistical – I see it in myself.

I see it in the way I am gracefully living my life.  I see it in the $1.00 Starbucks card I left at the coffee shop for the girl to surprise someone with a dollar off their order.

I see it in the way I am honoring myself and my contribution to this planet, I give my time, my caring, my being to those who cross my path.

What is it about where I am now in my life that is giving me the insights to know that the above things are valuable contributions to the world?
It is like the universe is in me and I am in the universe and the messages just come. 
Because I am LISTENING……  I am listening to what my intuition is telling me.

Right now, my eyes, my heart, my soul are focused on finding my life’s love.  And that has been an adventure in itself.  There were so many times I felt crushed and like I should just shut down, “Who was I to think I deserved to be loved?”   And something inside me would shout, “You are love, you deserve to be loved”.

And so I keep my heart open…..