109 days: An Update on some Change

"There is no such thing as a small miracle. A gym is a place of miracles. People do things they once thought impossible--lifting heavier, squeezing out one more rep, finding discipline and willpower they didn't know they had. They're amazed at how good they feel and look, and they carry their new power into the world. This is the miracle I wanted to give to the world."

-   Joe Wieder, excerpt from Brothers of Iron

Today is 109 days of clean eating.  I almost don’t know what dirty eating is anymore.  I am not tempted by cookies, donuts, cupcakes or fried chicken.  Gummy bears no longer hold me hostage, potato chips don't call my name.  I can pass on all that stuff.

Probably because I get up at 6 in the morning and eat some fruit and feel good. 

Finally, I feel like I have accomplished something. A huge something.  I have stuck to the plan for almost 120 days.

My goal to go for 120 days - then evaluate.

And finally, my body is beginning to feel wonderful to me again. I know from how hard I push myself in the gym that I am being successful, but finally I am internalizing the message. 

The jeans fit, but they're not loose (my goal) and everything else is finally getting more comfy and loose.  I am still on my journey to deal with this conundrum of how to be healthy, finding the right amount of exercise and eating right, and can I reintegrate some dessert type treats in to my routine and not go overboard.

I like to call the gym the playground and the machines and weights the toys (for grown-ups).  It makes me happy to be there.  I like challenging myself to build my strength, endurance and confidence in doing so.

Recently I picked up some 15 pound dumbbells and the first words out of my mouth were, “they’re too heavy”, but I kept doing the exercise.

The harder the exercise is, the more I sweat, the happier I am.  Because it has a finite time span in my day and for those few minutes, I am completely absorbed in my task: be it walk outs, burpies, squats or ab work. And I never give up.

The Kiss
acyrlic on panel board
5/2011
still in progress- working out the details

So that translates into other areas of my life. And things shift and change and move about with more ease as I make room for more ease in my life.

My art work has changed to include another person.  That is a new development for me.  One that I am still pondering and reflecting on. 

Change. Movement. Growth. Life. Being. Strength. Power. Love. Peace. Discipline. Joy. Mindfulness. Grace. Clarity.

Relationship.Communication.Happiness.




Addendum:  
This week I was tempted by food.  Late one nite, having worked out hard not eaten since lunch and out past my bedtime: someone tempted me with a protein shake.  Did I want one.  Of course I said yes. I was thirsty, I had not cheated all this time, this was a logical option for having not eaten.  Sadly or happily, I did not get the shake, I was told that it was too much sugar and too late for me to have it.  I did try to cheat.  I was asked what my favorite chocolate was and thought a box(chocolate covered peanuts) was coming my way ---it hasn't.  So it's not like I don't have little temptations around me.  But I am being kept  clean, clean, clean.